Bitterness leads to pride

So here I am living in a house with a very prideful man. I knew this going in, yet somehow it doesnt make living with him any easier. I'm not talking about my husband.
Today as he stood up my husband for a breakfast outing, i found myself in an outrage. How dare he! How could he? Why??
Well anyways I began flipping through my Bible. How noble of her, you say? No, I was trying to prove myself right in my anger and see just how much of a detrement to himself he was being by finding it in the Bible. Here I was alone in my thoughts thinking how he wronged us, how much better I am than him. (The apple doesnt fall far from the tree!) I'm all puffed up! I had a glimpse of my own bitterness and pride as I vented to my best friend.
I was noticing something the other day as I sat with my brother. When you hold on to your anger over something, no matter how justified you are in it, your bitterness begins to burn in your heart. Causing strife. That strife pushes you away from the very people you love. But still we sometimes hold on to that. Trying to justify our thinking by saying things like "they had no right to..." Or "I did nothing to deserve...." Or how about "they wont get away with it, because even though I'VE forgiven them, GOD will judge them!"
Oh yeah! Thats just how God wants us to think! *note the sarcasm* so I read a few Bible verses and feel justified in my anger, yet my anger doesnt leave. I'm still mad. I still feel the need to tell him something. I begin to realize that this feeling isnt right. Gods Word tells us a lot about pride and its destruction, about what pride is. In Romans 6:16 it talks about what you put your mind to becomes your master.
What am I putting my mind to? Bitterness? Resentment? Puffed up thinking? Or am I focusing on love? Forgiveness? And believing the best in people? (Heres a hint, its not the last option!) The realization that while someone else made a mistake, I delebrately allowed my mind to wander to a place of bitterness which is far worse than what went on in the first place. I cant be bitter. I cant allow that to become my master! I cant keep a record of wrongs. These things are soul eating parasites!
Just realizing that I can be just as prideful as the Bible warns me about, and being bitter leads to pride. I'm going to try and stay away from it all. Yea I kinda failed miserably this morning, but thank God for a faithful Father who forgives, and washes us clean. Time to replace all the negative thoughts with thankfulness!

Repentance

In a lot of churches the word repentance is a bad word. They think of repentance as souly focusing on how terrible of a person you are and well, that's just not ok. But as I've been looking into it more and more repentance is nessicary for transformation. Jesus preached the love of God but he also preached on repentance. Everwhere he went he told people to turn from their sins. Why doesn't the church speak on this?

Coming from a Baptist background I know the kind of damage it can do to a person to tell them that God doesn't love u for what u do, but simply because He decided to love you. Or you can't do anything good or right, only God can. Its like telling someone they aren't worth anything, then expecting them to be happy about it. God doesn't want you sad, He doesn't want you to hurt. But that focus on repentance leads to a whole lot of hurt. There always needs to be balance. You should speak on repentance, you should help people to see that its by grace we have been saved. BUT don't neglect to tell people that God has formed us and created us for a time such as this. Remind people of Gods great love for them, help them to see their value in the kingdom of God.

Everyone has a purpose for which they were created, some people the foot or the arm of the body of Christ, some the heart some the hands, etc etc. When we see ourselves as worthless and useless we digress to just that. When we see ourselves as perfect and without sin, we become puffed up with pride. We need to be in balance. Accepting that we have sinned, and continue to do so, seeking forgiveness daily, then moving on (not dwelling on our sins because there is no condemnation in those who love Christ) we need to see that there is something for us, something uniquely ours that we can do best because it was a job ceated with us in mind.  I'm saying this because people have been one or the other. And I crave that balance. I wish people when corrected would be corrected with love, not out of anger or jealousy, or pride. I wish I could see the church speaking on both love AND repentance.

But we as Christians ARE the church! So lets live in a way that is Holy and pleasing to God! Build eachother up, encourage eachother, there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. Remember also to repent when you recognize an area of sin in your life. Dont let that fester and grow, but dont beat yourself up. Just turn away from it. ( Yes easier said than done)
Gods grace is suffecient for us, lets grasp on to that grace and never let go!!

Digging up Treasures

"It will help you to understand Scriptures, if you mark not only what is spoken or written, but of whom or to whom, with what words, at what time, where, to what intent, with what circumstances, considering what goes before and what follows after"- Miles Coverdale

I'm not the most studious person, in fact I'm more likely to just accept what someone says than I am to dig and find answers to uncover the truth. However there have been a few Spirit led diggings I've done throughout my years and those have proven to be some of the most insightful and eye opening experiences I've had. I miss having the oomph to get into the Word of God. Sometimes I need a push to get me there. And more often than not, that push to read my Bible and study it comes in the form of having to prove someone wrong. Sad right? I know. But I found something that both convicted me and excited me at the same  2 Tomothy 2:15- Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.

I started reading 2 Timothy a few nights ago and I found out that if I actually paid attention to each verse and tried to understand the meaning in each verse,then I had a LOT of questions. But seeing that in verse 15 it says to "Study" realized its talking about me, and people like me. The ones not too interested in studying. And from experience I know that when I consistantly read the Bible i grow as a person, I grow in understanding, I grow in peace. The only bad thing that comes from it is realizing how bad I am at keeping it up.

My children are children. Duh. But they take what I say at face value. I told my daughter once that my necklace of "fairy dust" was really fairy dust and I was given it by fairies... she believed me. Never doubted. Full on faith. Now I can be a real hypocrite, and here's an example. We don't even do santa clause or tooth fairy. Yet for some reason I thought this was harmeless. When her friends questioned her and my daughter told them that mommy would never lie... well, I was crushed! I immediately told her the truth and apologized and promised never to lie to her again.
My reason for bringing that up is because, first:God is not human, that He should lie. So we can trust Gods Word as absolute truth.

And Second: when we fail to study, we often come to wrong conclusions and therefore have very very skewed perceptions of who God really is. People say they want to know God more, well I do anyways, but if we never study what He is saying our ideas of who God is are limited to a childs understanding with an adults amount of faith, which lets just say is the worst combination you can have.

We need childlike faith, with Solomon like wisdom, and David like faithfulness. Read your Bible carefully. The verses you have known since childhood will stand out if you take a minute to listen to the meaning, find the application, and understand the language it was spoken in.

I pray that everyone who reads this (myself included) will be spurred on to read their Bibles with eyes wide open, that God would grant each of us a good memory to remember what we have already read, and wisdom to see the dots that need to be connected. That our desire to read the Bible would be sparked with a flame that consumes our thoughts and we would be purified by reading His Word and renewing our minds in the process. In Jesus name. God bless you all!

Goodbye 2012!

Even though 2012 was a hard year, I was constantly reminded of how much God loves me. So many times I felt like I didn't deserve God's mercy or grace or love, times I had fallen, but EVERY SINGLE TIME God showed me that He loved me and would not let me go. I have not been perfect, but God has continued to shower me with his love. Giving me my hearts desire. What an amazing love He has for me. I can fail my Father again and again, I have disappointed him many times I'm sure, but over and over again His message to me has been "I will NEVER leave you, NEVER forsake you, I am with you always!" There is no love on earth like that. No spouse no matter how perfect can love you No matter what, No father or mother could love their child No matter what. there are always limits, boundaries that can't be crossed. But not with God. He loves me enough to send his son as a sin offering for me. He loves me enough to not see my sins, but to see the Righteousness of Jesus on me, He loves me enough to save me when I had turned my back on Him. I don't feel worthy of this love. I haven't deserved this love, I cant repay this kind of love. All I can do is thank Him, love him back with all that I can, and do my best to fulfill the two greatest commandments He gave: 1) Love the Lord your God with ALL your heart, mind and soul. 2)And Love others as yourself. That I suppose you could say would be my life long/New Years Resolution. psalms 139: Lord you have seen what is in my heart You know all about me... I'm amazed at how well you know me it's far more than I can understand.